The first of V's debts to the IFCC is called in at just the worst moment.
Cast
- The Order of the Stick
- Roy Greenhilt ◀ ▶
- Haley Starshine ◀ ▶
- Elan ◀ ▶
- Belkar Bitterleaf ◀ ▶
- Vaarsuvius (also as spirit) ◀ ▶
- Blackwing (also as spirit) ◀ ▶
- Sabine ◀ ▶
- The Inter-Fiend Cooperation Commission
Transcript
- Panel 1
Vaarsuvius's and Blackwing's souls are suddenly pulled out of their bodies.
Vaarsuvius: —gate?
- Panel 2
Vaarsuvius and Blackwing watch their bodies fall to the floor.
Vaarsuvius: GAAAHH!
- Panel 3
A light suddenly appears and their souls start to be pulled towards it.
- Panel 4
Their souls are then pulled down to hell and strapped to a table.
- Panel 5
Lee: Vaarsuvius! Welcome to Hell.
Vaarsuvius: What is the meaning of this?!?
Nero: It is my duty to inform you that my colleague here is exercising his option on the possession of your immortal soul.
Cedric: Twenty minutes, thirty-five seconds.
- Panel 6
Vaarsuvius: Outrageous! That possession was to be rendered following my death!
Lee: We never said that.
Nero: You assumed—
Cedric: —and we saw no reason to correct.
- Panel 7
Blackwing: Wait, what am I doing here? I never sold my soul!
Lee: True. You are what we in the business call a BOGO.
Nero: You bound your soul to the elf's when you became a familiar.
Cedric: We're not liable for any unintended side effects that may occur.
- Panel 8
Vaarsuvius: I see your game now. You shall possess my empty body, and with it seize the Gates for yourselves!
Lee: What? No, that's ridiculous.
- Panel 9
The IFCC hovers Vaarsuvius's table over to the couch where Sabine is seated.
Lee: That vessel is your rightful property. Putting another soul into it would be a gross violation of our contract.
Cedric: We're just going to hold on to you for a bit, then send you back.
Nero: In fact, your body will be shielded from all harm for the duration of your stay. We pride ourselves on our good customer service.
- Panel 10
Lee: After all, to paraphrase a wise man:
Cedric: "All that is required for Evil to triumph—
Nero: "—is for Neutral elves to do nothing."
The rest of the Order is shown on the HDTV.
Haley: Whatever it was, it stopped.
Roy: Let's blow this thing before it comes back.
Trivia
- "BOGO" stands for "Buy One, Get One."
- The fiends in the last panel paraphrase the very popular quotation, "The Only Thing Necessary for the Triumph of Evil is that Good Men Do Nothing". The attribution of the phrase has been somewhat controversial. U.S. President John F. Kennedy used the quote in a speech and attributed it to 18th century Irish statesman, poet, and philospher Edmund Burke, however the quote is not found in any of his writings. Charles F. Aked in 1916 may have the earliest verifiable use of the quote, but it may be based on writings of John Stuart Mill.