The Order are stopped in their tracks by a mysterious stranger.
Cast
Transcript
- Panel 1, Page 1
Miko: ORDER OF THE STICK!
Miko: You have been charged with crimes for which the only possible sentence is death.
Durkon: Wha tha...?
Miko: Surrender yourselves or have that sentence carried out immediately. The choice is yours!
Roy: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what is this all about?
- Panel 2, Page 1
Elan: See? I told you, Roy! I told you something was going to happen!
Roy: Shut up, Elan.
Roy: And you, buddy, we're not surrendering without a little—
- Panel 3, Page 1
Miko: As you wish.
Miko throws a bag in Vaarsuvius and Haley's direction.
- Panel 4, Page 1
The bag hits Vaarsuvius and covers V with goo; Haley Evades.
Vaarsuvius: Mmmph!
Haley: Ooo, tanglefoot bag! Those are a pain in the ass.
- Panel 5, Page 1
Vaarsuvius: Disintegrate!
The spells fails, "fizzle!" Elan runs away, blowing his kazoo, "Bzzz bzz bzzzz bzzzz!"
- Panel 6, Page 1
Vaarsuvius: Between the storm and this accursed adhesive, I can barely concentrate enough to remember my words of power!
Haley: Don't worry, a little Rapid Shot action should take him down a notch!
- Panel 7, Page 1
Haley fires three arrows, "fft! fft! fft!", but they fly all over the place in the storm.
- Panel 8, Page 1
Miko is attacking Roy.
Roy: Who are you? What do you want? What "crimes" are you talking about?
Miko: Silence. If at all possible, try to meet your fate with some dignity.
- Panel 9, Page 1
Belkar: Well, as usual, it falls to Yours Truly to save the day by serving someone a heapin' helping of Mama Bitterleaf's secret family recipe for their own steaming entrails on a platter.
Miko: Windstriker, NOW!
- Panel 1, Page 2
Belkar: "Windstriker"? What the hell is a-AAAHH!
The stranger's horse knocks Belkar's daggers from his hands and stands on him.
- Panel 2, Page 2
Belkar: Get off me, you stupid horse!
Belkar: Goddamn size modifiers to grapple checks!!
- Panel 3, Page 2
Roy: Durkon, don't just stand there! There's a storm, use Thor's Lightning.
Roy: Do something! Anything!
- Panel 4, Page 2
Durkon: ...
Durkon: I surrender.
- Panel 5, Page 2
Roy: That is NOT what I meant!!
Miko: Your dwarf is wise to accept the inevitable.
Miko: My turn.
- Panel 6, Page 2
Miko slashes repeatedly at Roy with her swords, "slash! slash! slash! slash! slash!"
Roy: GAHHH!
- Panel 7, Page 2
Vaarsuvius: Ah, I believe I have ascertained a solution. An incantation of lesser complexity should be more easily remembered.
Vaarsuvius: Fireball!
Haley: Wait, V, Roy is—
- Panel 8, Page 2
Vaarsuvius casts a Fireball, "wooosh!", but it hits Roy with Miko Evading the effects by leaping out the way of its explosion.
- Panel 9, Page 2
Vaarsuvius: That was not as effective as I would have hoped.
Elan: Aw man, he jumps like you, Haley!
Haley: Not even a singe...
- Panel 10, Page 2
Haley fires arrows again, "fft! fft! fft!", but again they scatter randomly in the wind.
Haley: Darn it!
- Panel 11, Page 2
Haley: Elan... give me your rapier.
Elan: What??
- Panel 1, Page 3
Haley: I can't shoot for crap in this rain and wind. You can't use it with your injured hand anyway.
Elan: Haley, you don't DO melee combat. There's a reason you don't carry a sword!
- Panel 2, Page 3
Roy is trying to fight Miko, but is heavily injured.
Haley (off-panel): Elan, Belkar's grappled, V is slimed, you're injured, and Durkon seems to have defected or something. If I don't get in there, Roy is a goner.
- Panel 3, Page 3
Elan: OK...OK, here. But just remember, I like you in one big Haley-shaped piece, so try to come back that way.
Haley: I'll do my best.
- Panel 4, Page 3
Haley: Wish me luck! Haley kisses Elan on the cheek, "smooch!"
- Panel 5, Page 3
Elan: Luck.
- Panel 6, Page 3
Belkar: Get off! Damn it, what the hell is the point of Wild Empathy if I can't get a horse off my friggin' chest??? Miko continues a whirlwind of attacks at Roy with her swords, "slash! slash! slash!"
- Panel 7, Page 3
Durkon: Lad, just surrender! Yer only makin' things worse fer us!
Roy: With all due respect, old friend, shove it.
- Panel 8, Page 3
Vaarsuvius: This needs to be ended quickly and decisively.
Vaarsuvius: Hold Person!
- Panel 9, Page 3
The spell doesn't seem to affect Miko.
Miko: The grace of my gods protect me from your corrupt magic, elf!
Haley (off-panel): Oh yeah? How are they at keeping you from becoming a shish kabob??
- Panel 10, Page 3
Haley sneaks up behind Miko.
Haley: SNEAK ATTACK!
Miko: AHHHH!
- Panel 11, Page 3
Roy: Good job, Haley. And thanks for the flank, it makes this much easier!
Roy hits Miko in the head with his club, "WHUMP!"
Miko: Unngh!
- Panel 1, Page 4
Roy: You want some more? Because some more can easily be arranged!
- Panel 2, Page 4
Miko's hood from her faces, revealing the stranger to be a dark haired woman.
Roy: Wow...
- Panel 3, Page 4
Miko: Honorless dogs! I will see you lawfully executed despite your shameful tactics!
- Panel 4, Page 4
Miko: Stunning Kick!
Miko slashes at Roy with one sword whilst kicking Haley in the face.
- Panel 5, Page 4
Elan: HALEY!
Vaarsuvius: Suggestion!
The spells goes "fizzle!".
Vaarsuvius: DAMNATION!
- Panel 6, Page 4
Elan: Haley, speak to me!
Haley looks dazed.
Haley: I'm Henry the 8th, I am, Henry the 8th, I am, I am...
- Panel 7, Page 4
Durkon: Elan, ye have to stop Roy! This be all wrong! Wit me low Charisma modifier, I cannae get him to listen to reason!
Haley: Ooooo! Look! A tiny fuzzy man!
- Panel 8, Page 4
Roy: Actually, Durkon, I think I'm beginning to figure that—
Miko attacks Roy, "slash-slash!", making him drop his club.
Roy: OOF!
Miko: Die, evildoer!
Elan: Wait, did she just call Roy an "evildoer"?
Durkon: Tha's what I've been tryin' to say!
- Panel 9, Page 4
Roy: Hey, babe, listen, clearly we got off on the wrong foot, but I think if we all calm down and—
Miko: Still your tongue! The lies of the wicked cannot be believed!
- Panel 10, Page 4
Miko raises her sword above her head, a blue glow surrounding it.
Miko: In the name of the just Lord Shojo, master of the Sapphire Guard, I execute you for crimes against existence!
Durkon: No! Stop!
- Panel 11, Page 4
Miko: SMITE EVIL!
Miko slashes down at Roy with her sword.
D&D Context
- A number of Paladin class features can be seen in this strip.
- Paladins get celestial mounts. Miko's is Windstriker.
- Paladins gain Divine Grace which gives a bonus to all saving throws equal to a characters Charisma modifier. Miko made her saving throw against Vaarsuvius' spell.
- Smite Evil is an ability which provides extra chance to hit and extra damage against an evil-aligned character.
- Miko's Monk class features can be seen in the strip as well.
- A tanglefoot bag covers a character in goo which becomes hard quickly. To escape, a character must make a Strength check, which Vaarsuvius likely is not good at. The goo gives a number of negative effects, including making spellcasting more difficult.
- Small characters, like Belkar, receive a penalty to Grapple checks while Large creatures, like horses, receive a bonus. Thus it is much easier for larger creatures to pin down smaller ones.
- Rangers gain a class feature called Wild Empathy that allows them to calm animals.
- A rogue's sneak attack ability also works if the target is flanked. In this case Haley and Roy are flanking Miko because she has enemies on both sides of her.
- The Charisma stat affects a characters ability to change other people's minds; Durkon's low modifier makes this unlikely.
- Rapid Shot is a Feat that allows an extra ranged shot, however all attacks in that turn take a penalty to accuracy.
- Fireball is a 3rd-level Wizard spell that explodes and deals damage in a radius.
- Disintegrate is a 6th-level Wizard spell that does large amounts of damage and causes the body of the target to disintegrate if killed.
- Hold Person is a 3rd-level Wizard spell that paralyzes a target that fails a Will save.
- Suggestion is a 3rd-level Wizard spell that hypnotizes the target.
Trivia
- At 4 pages and 42 panels in length, this is the longest comic created so far.
- This is the first comic in which Lord Shojo is named.
- This is the first comic where Windstriker's name is mentioned.
- Elan's prediction that no one would get smooched because of the dramatic rain in the previous comic turned out to be false as Haley gives him a good luck kiss.
- In the 8th panel of the 4th page, Haley is singing I'm Henery the Eighth, I am a 1910 song by Fred Murray and R. P. Weston. Herman's Hermits cover of the song in 1965 became the fastest selling single in history to that point.